January 4th 2012, a.k.a WORST DAY EVER!

Argh! My head really ache right now! As I expected, the first day or school sucks!

I don't really know why Charmz, but I kinda feel like I want to be in my former class again! I don't care if people say it's the last class or the "dumbest" class of all. The thing is, I really love that class with all of my classmates way better than this new one. Not that I hate my new classmates or anything! I never said that, once!

I used to sit in a perfect place where I have the perfect view in my old class with my friends Umi Umaira and Swarnaa by my side. We often chit-chat a lot and had so much fun. There might be some time where I can't stand them but, deep inside I know that they are the best partners! They make me laugh whenever I feel bummed and we often had a pack to get somebody! haha!

Well now, my friend Umi has moved to some place far from here. However, Swarnaa is still in the same class as me but she sits in front now while I'm quietly at the back. We can't have those loud conversations that we used to have anymore. And now, my other friend Laksumitha isn't in the same class anymore. She's very funny and likes to talk! No kidding! But, she is a fun girl to be with...

Now I'm in the new class feeling like a freaky mute new-comer and I hate my place. That's cuz I can barely see from there. Another thing is, my partners aren't as fun as last years' any longer. Most of my classmates are very competitive and I feel belittled sometimes. When I was in my old class, I feel very happy to help lots of people around me but now, I feel like standing "below the radar" You get what I mean Charmz?--I hope you do.

Another thing that happened today is that me and my BFF didn't get the chance to eat during recess. There's so many "big people" around that the queue is freaking long like never before. And when we were about to buy something, the food and beverages are almost finished and we can't even find a place to sit!!! That really does sucked!! We were just strolling around the school with a plain bread in our hands talking like idiots!

 I feel like almost everyone wants to bring me down. But I know just what to do.
Lastly, I would like to say..  Dear 2012--Please be nice to me.\

Can't talk much Charmz because I've got some books to read and homework to complete.
Ok then. Buh-bye!
XOXO

ALMOST the first day of school!

Daer Charmz Diary,

Tomorrow is officially the first day of school in 2012 which is on January 4th 2012. I don't know should I feel happy and excited or sad and a bit bummed. Well, I obviously will feel happy tomorrow cuz I could see and my fiends after a long holiday. But on the other hand, will there be anyone who want to be my friend in my new class? Yeah, that's what I'm worried about. They are not actually "new" to me but almost all of us haven't been in the same class before. We just know one another but never a classmate. What if they refuse to be friends with me or talk to me?

But on the bright side, there's no more noisy-makers in my class and no more people to tease me and bring me down. Well, I hope so...

Ok then Charmz. Can't chat for long. Bye now!
XXX

Tear Me Down Like A Paper?

Hey Charmz. It's good to write to you again. I don't know why but I just feel kind of bummed. I really feel like everyone is trying to put me down. I feel ignored and neglected. Sometimes, even my own BFF would talk to another person without telling me. Even they are right in front of my eye balls.!! But I don't really blame her...   (I guess) And what makes me sad is that I'm lacking of friends. They must have look/judge me like I'm some kind or freaky nerd weirdo! Did everything I do is wrong and so bad?

I also often get bugged by my physical appearance. I mean... I'm really short and "plumpy". I hate that! If only the lady, Jillian from the Biggest Loser could come here and "fix" me a little. You know what I mean. Some of my classmates are so mean. They call me names that a person hated to be called. Even my best friend looks me like that. But, I just pretend that I didn't care by laughing my heart out most of the time. I wouldn't go to anyone and say "Hey you. You know that your words hurt me?" cuz I don't want to. But what I really wanted to say is " Hey! stop belittling me and putting me down!" But I didn't dare myself to.

I wish the people who makes me feel small out there could have read this and they could realize what they made.But I'm not saying all of my friends/people hurt me. Just... most of them.

So I guess I'll have to go now Charmz. It's such a relief writing to you this evening.
Have a great day!

Sincerely,
Me...
(feeling down and ignored)

Home Sweet Home ♥

People often says home sweet home and believe it or not, even though you're not living in an enormous mansion, you will feel as if your home is the perfect home in the entire universe. I am not kidding. I'm back from my 4 days 3 nights vacation and although the place where I crashed into is pretty nice, but I still love my own home.

It's pretty exhausting walking here and there and I slept for like just 5 hours a day. My family and I have been walking all day long and both my legs are having an awful cramp and ache. The sultry days were very suckish. But putting that aside, I had a wonderful trip I guess. I'm really bewildered watching many kinds of people walking here and there with some sickly thick clothes just to appear beautiful and outstanding. 

On top of that, it also gives me a headache observing "colorful" people who had come from all around the globe to this overcrowded and busy metropolis. Maybe they are going for the year-end-sale or something I'm not really sure. But anyway, I bought some items that I planned to buy but still didn't get some stuffs that I want. I'm not going to tell you what are they!

Believe it or not, I just ate half of a roasted chicken for two days straight! No kidding! I'm really putting on weight now and trying hard to lose'em fast! Or else, I'll look like a big fat chicken and my friends will make fun of me for sure! (OK maybe not until a "big fat chicken") hahahaha! But, I really love those chickens and I'm determined to roast one exactly like that. You think I can do it? Yeah, I have no clue about that either.

Well, see you next time, Charmz!!

XOXO

Do I belong?

Dear Charmz Diary,

It's me, your best friend. Can I ask you something? Do you think I "belong" in my friends? Well... I just watched a movie called Barbie Mariposa. Now I'm not trying to prove or show you that I'm rather childish for a 14 year old girl. But, in that movie, Mariposa exclaimed that she felt like she don't belong in the place where she lives which is called Flutterfield. And.. when I look back, I don't feel like I belong in my "place" too. I mean, I have the least friends among my friends. Yeah, No kidding! I often feel ignore and being left out just because I don't like things that they like and they don't fancy stuff that I find interesting. Is that my fault? One of my friends told me that I don't have to care what they like and the only thing I've to do is just be myself. I know that's the best thing to do but it's kinda hard though. Sitting in a territory where no one seems to get what you're trying to say...

I really like those kinda songs like''skyscraper'', "who's laughing now" and "Lala land" by some various inspiring singers. Those words are so much alike to my situation. Those songs are about a person who doesn't feel belong in their own spaces. In the Barbie Mariposa movie, Mariposa succeeded in saving her land Flutterfield and right after that, she always feel belong...Should I save "my land" to feel belong too? I don't think so...

But now, I'm thinking, "screw these people" I know what I like and I'm not going to pretend to like something that I don't just so that I could feel belong and fit it. I want to be ME! And no one can ever tell me to be someone who I'm not. I still have friends who enjoys the same stuffs as me. Wherever I go, I know that my friends will always be there beside me...

I guess I've said what I really wanna say, dear Charmz...
So, goodbye for now!
XXX

Last Day of Torture! PEACE OUT

Why last day a torture? Wondering what's the definition of it?

Haha! In this case, what I actually mean is "The Last Day of School". The school days in 2010 kinda sucked and 2011 has improved a bit. Not much anyway. So now, it's officially end of school for year 2011. So, very, glad that it has finally come to an end.

By the way, me and couple of my friends planned to have ANOTHER "ice fight" today. One of them even willing to sponsor a bag of ice. (yeah my friends are crazy) But then, we realized that we don't have much time and some of the teachers ACTUALLY entered the class. What a bummer! But, we did take couple of photos before the bell rings. I figured out that I might miss some of my classmates later on because next year, not all of us will be in the same class. Sad right?

Well, whatever. Now that holiday is official on, it's time for me to sleep late and watch all the movies and videos I want! YAY! But on the other hand, I also have tonnes to complete by the end of this year. I'm going to face one of the biggest exams next year, you know? (yeah it's unbelievable!!) But I'm still gonna enjoy my looong holiday, anyway.

My buddies and I are planning to go somewhere but we haven't decide yet. Just waiting for all the answers.
Ok then. I guess this is goodbye Charmz!
XXX

Ice fight!!!

"Ready? FIRE!!!!"

Hey yaw!! It's me again. Who else could it be? Hahaha! Wondering why my post title sounds kind of weird? Well of course it is. It's one of the best part in the year 2011 for my classmates and I!!

Today, my friends and I planned to have a YEAR-END PARTY 2011 for our class.  We had to pay a few bucks which to me is no big deal. However, there are some of them who "refuse" to pay it. I don't understand these people..By the way, there's barely enough food at the party cuz of them. Our class teacher joined us too and she thanked us for planning all of this and for the such wonderful meal. 

But out of the blue, something hit me on my waist. I found out it was a cold, hard ice. I didn't shout out loud although I'm supposed to do so. I just laughed and turned around. My class monitor ordered us to stop doing that and stay calm. But then, I announced "Ah, what the heck! School's almost over! So, ICE FIGHT!!!!" I think I was kind of the "mastermind" in this. We all started to grab a hand full of ice cubes and tossing them to one another. They secretly gathered at the back of the class without telling me and then, they threw a bunch of hard ice on me!! I was alone at the front, getting hit, HARD! (mean) xD

It was an utter chaos. By the way, one teacher reported the "mess" to our class teacher and then, we all got scold by her. I was sitting in my seat, SHRINKING slowly in shame. But.... Screw them all! It was totally fun. I had a video of it in my camera. wow! It was extremely fun, even after got scold by the teacher. HAHAHAHA!!!

So I guess that's all that happened at the party bash! i'm so gonna miss my classmates. Well, maybe not all of them..
One last word..

2 HARMONI 2011 ROCKS!!! (that was written on the cake)

Bye then Miss Charmz
XXXX